The Warped Woodturner (TWW) is a local artist traveling his artist's journey in a suburb of Springbrook, WI (pop. 536). TWW's creative calling is to use a wood lathe to make useless objects from locally-sequestered organic carbon for tourists to bring back to the city to give to people they had to buy something for but do not like that much. His target market is the senior citizens since their vision is not as good as it used to be so cannot see the defects as well. His marketing jingle is: “Bowls as simple as their creator”.

Friday, August 31, 2012

Trail cam action









Question for the day

How will the Dems outdo this one at their love fest coming up ?





The real question for the day is why anything these Hollywood people says should actually matter. 

Thursday, August 30, 2012

The eye of the beholder


"I shall not today attempt further to define the kinds of material I understand to be embraced within that shorthand description ["hard-core pornography"]; and perhaps I could never succeed in intelligibly doing so. But I know it when I see it, and the motion picture involved in this case is not that. —Justice Potter Stewart 

What would he say about this on YouTube? 

Wednesday, August 29, 2012

War against Black Republican Women Goes On

see: http://twitchy.com/2012/08/29/sick-wikipedia-entry-calls-mia-love-dirty-worthless-whore-and-house-nigger/


"Sick: Wikipedia entry calls Mia Love ‘dirty, worthless whore’ and ‘House Nigger’ "

Latest skirmish in the war against women



 The real question is who is against whom? 

Tuesday, August 28, 2012

Mrs. TWW's New Honey Do List

Now whenever Mrs. TWW wants TWW to do something she merely has to come to this blog and fill out the form below and submit it (submit is not in her vocabulary so she may never use the form)  and the item goes to TWW's To Do list.   (Google stores it in a spreadsheet in the clouds).

Monday, August 27, 2012

Trail camera action


Trail cam has yet to capture a picture of the bear but like Alfred Hitchcock TWW has been in the film many times. 




The deer feeding trough is done (except for gray paint) so when the corn is delivered TWW will move the trail cam to catch the action as CWD spreads. 




Thanks to Mr. and Mrs. Muse (their blog name for security)


After bringing over some nice snacks last Friday (see post below) Mr. Muse stopped up this morning with some delicious-looking apple pie.  TWW wants to acknowledge Mr. Muse as the inspiration for a new addition to the theory of country freeloading which was the start of this blog.  TWW in all good faith and not expecting anything in return gave the Muses some apples from the Red Duchess tree for them enjoy.  They did but also brought back some of the finished product to share with the TWWs.  Thanks!

But now the muse part.  What TWW did not realize is you can give premiums that can keep on giving.   If you give someone a raw product convertible to treats a certain number of people will bake something and return the favor.  This may not work with people who have to drive a distance back home before they can make the goodies. This part of the theory needs to be studied more.  But TWW is thankful for the help with evolving the theory. 

Project Guillotine - editorial

By now you must have heard about the Occupy Wall Street and their intellectual supporters talking about how we need make the rich pay their fair share.  Project Guillotine  is a way for the intellectuals to mimic their European socialist heroes and their traditions going back to the French Revolution. 

What we need to do is find all the rich people, confiscate their undeserved wealth and use it to pay for needed government programs.  Forbes magazine has its list of billionaires and TWW found the list and filtered out all of the non-American rich people since we cannot easily confiscate their money. See the list below.   They have wealth of about $654 billion between them.  This could have been enough to cover some of the years of the Bush deficits but not enough to cover 2012 under Obama.  This means we need to go further down the list to find people with enough money to pay for needed government programs.  

The only drawback with approach is all the rich people who have their money taken away could be homeless but they deserve it.  A bigger problem is these rich would no longer be paying any taxes so eventually you and I would have to have our wealth confiscated to keep the government serving the people who deserve it and with our wealth gone we would finally be the deserving poor. 



Rough deficit numbers from: http://www.usgovernmentspending.com/downchart_gs.php?year=2000_2012&view=1&expand=&units=b&fy=fy11&chart=G0-fed&bar=1&stack=1&size=m&title=&state=US&color=c&local=s



berst


source of information: http://www.forbes.com/billionaires/list/

 Bill Gates                                    $61 B    56 Microsoft United States
 Warren Buffett                            $44 B    81 Berkshire Hathaway United States
 Larry Ellison                               $36 B    67 Oracle United States
 Christy Walton                            $25.3 B 57 Wal-Mart United States
 Charles Koch                               $25 B   76 diversified United States
 David Koch                                  $25 B   71 diversified United States
 Sheldon Adelson                         $24.9 B 78 casinos United States
 Jim Walton                                  $23.7 B 64 Wal-Mart United States
 Alice Walton                               $23.3 B 62 Wal-Mart United States
 S. Robson Walton                       $23.1 B 68 Wal-Mart United States
 Michael Bloomberg                    $22 B     70 Bloomberg LP United States
 George Soros                              $20 B      81 hedge funds United States 
 Sergey Brin                                $18.7 B   38 Google United States
 Larry Page                                  $18.7 B   39 Google United States
 Jeff Bezos                                  $18.4 B   48 Amazon.com United States
 Mark Zuckerberg                       $17.5 B   27 Facebook United States
 Michael Dell                             $15.9 B   47 Dell United States
 Steve Ballmer                            $15.7 B   56 Microsoft United States
 Phil Knight                                $14.4 B   74 Nike United States
 Paul Allen                                 $14.2 B   59 Microsoft, investments United States
 Carl Icahn                                 $14 B      76 leveraged buyouts United States
 Forrest Mars Jr                         $13.8 B   80 candy United States
 Jacqueline Mars                       $13.8 B   72 candy United States
 John Mars                                $13.8 B   75 candy United States
 Anne Cox Chambers                $12.5 B   92 media United States
 John Paulson                           $12.5 B    56 hedge funds United States
 Donald Bren                            $12 B      79 real estate United States
 Ronald Perelman                     $12 B      69 leveraged buyouts United States
 Len Blavatnik                          $11.9 B   54 diversified United States
 Harold Hamm                          $11 B      66 oil & gas United States
 James Simons                          $10.7 B  73 hedge funds United States
 Jack Taylor & family       $10.4 B  89 Enterprise Rent-A-Car United States
 Abigail Johnson                      $10.3B   50 Fidelity United States
 Ray Dalio                               $ 10B      62 hedge funds United States
 George Kaiser                         $10 B     69 oil & gas, banking  United States
 Laurene Powell Jobs & family $9 B     48 Apple, Disney United States

Total                                         $654 Billion

Saturday, August 25, 2012

Friday, August 24, 2012

Most recent proof the principles of country freeloading are still valid

The original article on the principles of country freeloading (see:  http://warpedwoodturner.blogspot.com/2005/12/successful-country-freeloading.html )
said to give generous donors premiums when they donate to your cause.  Here is the latest example as the generous donors in the farm/bootlegger's house to the north of Garbin Moraine brought a portable grazing party to GM tonight.  Their premium is the pretzel bowl.  If you would like to receive such a premium call the Garbin Moraine public affairs office and ask for details. 



Sunday, August 19, 2012

Latest wrinkle in the culture wars



http://www.asexuality.org/home/ is the web page for the asexuals. Will the social conservatives harass these people too? Will the liberals be aghast since it proves not everyone is doing it so we may not need as many birth control services in the high schools? Since it has something to do with sex be sure to watch for it when you are checking out at the grocery store. 

Fall fog blankets Garbin Moraine






Saturday, August 18, 2012

What is the younger generation coming to?



This must have been caused by the liberal indoctrination in the schools.

Friday, August 17, 2012

Romney and Ryan's Apple Tax Plan

Under R & R's new tax plan for apple farmers the government share will be the crop from the trees with lots of apples on them and you will get the apples from the other trees. 


Here is your share: 


Status of Mrs. TWW's new deer feeding troughs

Thanks to Q & D Constructions farm division Mrs TWW  got her new deer feeding troughs. The problem is people cannot legally feed deer anymore so we are not sure what to do with the troughs once TWW fills them with dirt and somehow gets them all level. 




Thanks

Measure Twice Cut Once - part 2

Mrs. TWW's cherry vase with a shorter tube inside (it finally came). 


Seniors can breathe easier now

"

Social Security Administration Explains Plan to Buy 174,000 Hollow-Point Bullets"



We are safe from the Social Security people so now we can go back to fretting about Medicare cuts. 

Wednesday, August 15, 2012

Obama's plan to save Social Security?

Will the Social Security Administration just shoot the seniors?? If not why do they need to buy bullets? 

see this link for the request for quotes: https://www.fbo.gov/index?s=opportunity&mode=form&id=6c39a2a9f00a10187a1432388a3301e5&tab=core&_cview=0&fb_source=message

TWW is a CENGA and loving it


"Zogby calls them "CENGAs" for "college-educated, not going anywhere.".....Zogby speculates that Romney's selection of 42-year-old Rep. Paul Ryan helped turn more younger voters to him. "It could be his youthfulness," said Zogby of Ryan. Plus, he said, more younger voters are becoming libertarian, distrustful of current elected officials and worried that they are going to get stuck with the nation's looming fiscal bill. "
TWW says: "There is hope for the younger generation"

Your tax dollars at work if you are a cheesehead


"An incarcerated 43-year-old Milwaukee man is suspected of using a van he drove as part of a work-release program to help commit at least four burglaries of Mequon businesses on North Port Washington Road in June and July.... the van belonged to the Department of Corrections and the suspect was then traced to a cell at the Marshall E. Sherrer Correction Center on North 14th Street, Milwaukee.

see: http://www.mequonnow.com/news/166111956.html#!page=0&pageSize=10&sort=newestfirst

Tuesday, August 14, 2012

Your tax dollars at work

https://www.fbo.gov/index?s=opportunity&mode=form&tab=core&id=bfd95987a1ad9a6dfb22bca4a19150cb&_cview=0

The link is to a site where the 'weather bureau' (if you are old you can remember who they are) are saying they want to buy a bunch of ammunition. What are they going to shoot with it??

Saturday, August 11, 2012

War against women continues

This time it is the animnal lovers who are mounting the battle. See: http://twitchy.com/2012/08/05/anti-hunting-mob-urges-team-usa-shooter-corey-cogdell-to-shoot-herself-advocates-violence-against-family/

Some tweeted quotes:

"@CoreyCogdell So you like killing animals? I hope you suffer a long, painful death. I trully do."

"@CoreyCogdell please go shoot yourself in the knees. YOU ANIMAL MURDERER!! you're a disgusting human being.— "

"@CoreyCogdell I hope that someone someday shoot your whole familly just practicing.— "


Friday, August 10, 2012

Measure twice cut once


This is Mrs. TWW's surprise birthday present. The surprise is the glass tube is too big for the wooden vase.  Well, maybe by next birthday TWW can buy a tube that is smaller. 

Wednesday, August 08, 2012

Friday, August 03, 2012

T-shirt of the day


This a whole new to get people to respect you.  They are available at  http://founditemclothing.com/t-shirts/guns.html


And if you want to show the world you really are cool you can upload the one below to your Facebook page.  See http://covermyfb.com/covers/19279/guns+don't+kill+people...+i+do







Forgetfulness

TWW took the cover off of the septic tank yesterday and removed the filter and cleaned it but forgot to get some action pictures for his three loyal readers.  Other than that it has been real quiet at Garbin Moraine.  It's off to the cities for a senior citizens wedding this weekend. Why can't these people just live in sin like they did when they were younger. Weddings are not life enrichment.  And fortunately Mrs. TWW did not read this last night: http://www.haywardwi.com/opinion/letters/article_c17ff348-dc0e-11e1-b558-0019bb2963f4.html

Past posts you fortunately may have missed

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