Floating around the Internet and family cabin

Seen on the Internet:

"Dear Opimist, Pessimist and Realist, 

While you guys were busy arguing about the glass of water I drank it.

                                                                     Sincerely,
                                                                      the Opportunist"


Found written on the cabin siding in yellow liquid a while back: 

Dear TV beer drinkers and real beer drinkers:

While you guys were arguing whether TV beer or real beer in cans tasted better, I knocked over the cans and drank them. 

                                                                    Sincerely,
                                                                    Smokey (the late black lab)"