TWW recently learned of the Eat More - Breathe Less Method (EMBLM) of saving the planet. Unlike other plans promoted by the liberal elite such as Clinton and Edwards, this plan is pushed by someone who practices what he preaches by becoming a personal carbon sink (PCS).
The Eat More - Breathe Less Method (affectionately called 'embalm' in elite circles) lets people think globally while acting locally as they become PCSs by eating more and exercising less. This means a net storage of carbon instead of exhaling carbon into the air while exercising. EMBLM insures CO2 will not escape into the air of our fragile planet by insuring the PCSs are buried in a sealed casket. This is the same process as the planet used to store carbon in petroleum and coal for billions of years until western capitalism reversed the process to make obscene profits. The EMBLM method also helps with population control (hence will save Social Security) since it will drop life expectancies so people will not be around as long to pollute the planet. For more help with becoming a personal carbon sink visit: http://www.algore.org/
A veteran (thank him for his service) owned and operated company existing only in TWW's imagination and in this website
HOW TO ORDER A BOWL
The Warped Woodturner (TWW) is a local artist traveling his artist's journey in a suburb of Springbrook, WI (pop. 536). TWW's creative calling is to use a wood lathe to make useless objects from locally-sequestered organic carbon for tourists to bring back to the city to give to people they had to buy something for but do not like that much. His target market is the senior citizens since their vision is not as good as it used to be so cannot see the defects as well. His marketing jingle is: “Bowls as simple as their creator”.
Friday, November 16, 2007
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