TWW is The Warped Woodturner who is a local artist living in a suburb of Springbrook, WI (pop 87). His mission is to use a wood lathe to make interesting but mostly useless objects from locally-sequestered carbon for tourists to bring back to the city to give to people they had to buy something for but don't like that well. His target market is the senior citizens since their vision is not as good as it used to be so cannot see the defects as well.
Monday, December 31, 2007
Sunday, December 30, 2007
Thursday, December 27, 2007
TWW's orginal letter said: "city people taking unnecessary trips in their BIG SUVs ".
After editing for clarity the letter said: "city people taking unnecessary trips in their "big sport utility vehicles" SUVs ". That is what appeared in the paper version of the newspaper.
The printed version is usually supposed to also be found here: http://www.spooneradvocate.com/advocate/?section_id=60 (you will need to look through all the other opinions to find it).
Saturday, December 22, 2007
Thanks to the owners of the following link for loaning the image:
Viewers with animal rights issues may want to check out their great animal picture collection.
TWW wanted a cordless drill so he started out by cutting off the cord on an old-time electrical drill. When he went to the local Radio Shack they told him they did not sell batteries that would work with his drill. Does anyone have any idea what he should do next?
Friday, December 21, 2007
Thought for the day: Is there a consensus amongst the lemmings before they run off the cliff?
The TWW Enterprises annual customer appreciation sale will be held January 5th - January 19th at the main workshop discount store. All Signature Quality bowls will be priced with a 40% surcharge, all Signature Lined-Through class bowls will have a 25% surcharge and all Unmarked bowls will have a 10% surcharge. For example, a Signature Quality bowl normally priced at $20 will have an added surcharge of 40% x $20 = $8. The sale price will be $28 plus tax. TWW appreciates your loyalty
There is a consensus of TWW's customers that his prices are the best around and that in the future bad things will happen to you if you do not agree.
Customers: If you are not aware of the new TWW Enterprises Bowl Quality Rating Policy see: http://warpedwoodturner.blogspot.com/2007/12/new-tww-enterprises-quality-marking.html
Thursday, December 20, 2007
First picture shows the switchblade folded in the safe position.
This picture shows it ready for action.
Wednesday, December 19, 2007
Monday, December 17, 2007
Thursday, December 13, 2007
TWW Enterprises announces its quality bowl marking system. Bowl quality marks are now found on the bottom of each bowl TWW produces.
- If you find TWW on the bottom of a bowl it signifies a TWW Signature Quality Bowl. This means TWW says this bowl meets and exceeds (but not by too much) TWW's promise of producing the best imperfect bowls possible
- TWW (lined-through) means TWW originally thought this bowl met standards but on further examination found minor blemishes so withdrew the Signature Quality Bowl status awarded earlier. All previously owned bowls sold by TWW Enterprises automatically get this rating.
- A bare bowl bottom shows TWW does not want to call this bowl his own. These bowls are factory 4ths and sold as such.
Note: All TWW lined-through bowls are sold at 3rd-rate prices and all TWW signature bowls are sold at 2nd-rate prices.
"At TWW Enterprises we take quality and health issues seriously. Rest assured we do NOT use any lead paints on our bowls and children are in no way in danger from our bowls. (please note: TWW Enterprises takes no responsibility for what customers put in their bowls). So remember at TWW Enterprises all of our bowls are made by white European craftsman from wood taken from land ceded by the Native Americans, using only sustainable forestry practices and then handcrafted using only quality Chinese tools. When properly cared for and not burned our bowls will act as carbon sinks for centuries."
Tuesday, December 11, 2007
There is a hidden roll of stamps inside the cherry base. (Click on the pic to expand it). The real question is whether to put the paper clip in the center of the tree or the center of the wood. Which looks better? For this one we tried to use the center of the tree so it looks off of center.
Sunday, December 09, 2007
Tuesday, December 04, 2007
Here is what it is like in Maui. They have a sun. For now we can dream and borrow pictures.
source of picture:
Monday, December 03, 2007
One of the original converts to the Eat More Breathe Less Method (EMBL) invented by Algore is Michael Moore. In his latest documentary, Fatso, Moore bravely takes on the diet and physical fitness industries for destroying the planet by convincing people they should not be personal carbon sinks (PCS). Diets and exercise contribute approximately 5% of the amount of CO2 released into the atmosphere each year in developed countries. The documentary will be available in 2008.
Source of picture: http://www.dba-oracle.com/images/fat_moore.jpg
Sunday, December 02, 2007
Past posts you fortunately may have missed
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- ► 2015 (185)
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- ► 2013 (224)
- ► 2012 (392)
- ► 2011 (389)
- ► 2010 (446)
- ► 2009 (354)
- ► 2008 (274)
- Final holiday greeting for 2007
- Upside down bottomless bowl
- Every dog wants to be the last one to claim the hy...
- Happy Holiday Season to all Three Loyal Visitors
- Battery pack neeeded
- Which Global Warming Consensus to Believe?
- Post-Holiday Customer Appreciation Sale Pre-Announ...
- Early Christmas present
- New bowl line
- Another good picture of Mrs. Clinton
- New TWW Enterprises Quality Marking Policy
- Press Release
- Which center is in the middle?
- Lake Pictures
- Pictures from boring holiday newsletter
- NAFTA superhighway to bypass TWW's neighborhood
- Is there an ice age coming back?
- New Documentary from an EMBL Method Advocate
- For a life enriching experience
- Is the drought over??
- Winter comes early?
- holey virgin bowls
- ▼ December (22)
- ► 2006 (175)