TWW is The Warped Woodturner who is a local artist living in a suburb of Springbrook, WI (pop 87). His mission is to use a wood lathe to make interesting but mostly useless objects from locally-sequestered carbon for tourists to bring back to the city to give to people they had to buy something for but don't like that well. His target market is the senior citizens since their vision is not as good as it used to be so cannot see the defects as well.

Sunday, May 31, 2009

It's a good thing liberals drive little cars

If someone put this bumper sticker on their car they don't have as much to worry about as the bumper stickers that irritate the people in BIG SUVs.

source of bumper sticker:

Saturday, May 30, 2009

For life enrichment install a IIPS

To prevent needless trips to see Dr. McGillicuddy the TWWs decided to install a custom-made Inebriated In-law Protection System (IPSS) today. It is not sexy but should do the job.

Friday, May 29, 2009

The sheeple have spoken: we love BO (it is his policies we don' quite get)

"It must be said, that like the breaking of a great dam, the American decent into Marxism is happening with breath taking speed, against the back drop of a passive, hapless sheeple, excuse me dear reader, I meant people."

This quote is from Pravda - I added the color to sheeple


thanks to: for loaning us the picture without your knowledge

Commentary for seniors who voted for BO

TWW Commentary

"The current quagmire we face with Social Security came about when the New Deal politicians created a Ponzi scheme Bernard Madoff would be proud of. They created the illusion of an entitlement so people would give their hard-earned money to the government with the promise of a well-deserved payback in old age. But like any good Ponzi scheme the government schemers spent all the money they got and now all that is left is a pile of IOUs called treasury bonds only payable with future workers putting in money so the earlier investors can be paid off to keep the scheme going. Unlike people who never had health insurance, 401K accounts or pensions, many people had them all while working and now with Social Security have a government-subsidized retirement far better than they deserve

The only way we can save Social Security is a means test so only the deserving poor get Social Security. But a means test usually means wasting money on administrative costs. Fortunately, the descendents of the New Deal politicians have shown us the way out of the mess with the recent stimulus package. That package first made it legal to pay bonus money to people at AIG and then the politicians turned around and wanted to tax 100% of the bonus money.

The same solution can save Social Security. People file income tax returns and for little administrative cost income taxes can be used to recoup Social Security payments to people who don't truly deserve or need them. Currently some Social Security money is taxed but the rates are way too low. Wealthy people like retired AIG executives should be required to pay all of their Social Security money back with their income tax return. This 'shared sacrifice' surtax on Social Security payments would have to be progressive so truly needy people pay no taxes but those better off would pay proportionately more back. This Fair Deal approach is about the only way we can save Social Security for people who really need it."

Note: TWW Commentaries do not necessarily represent the opinions of the staff, management or sponsors of this blog but they should. These commentaries will only be included here while it is legal to do so on the Internet.

Thursday, May 28, 2009

Wednesday, May 27, 2009

Another increase in viewership

TWW welcomes the newest viewer of this useless blog.

Another odd billboard

The source of this is: (another ill-mannered hotlink)

There are a bunch of people out there who think President BO was born in Kenya instead of Hawaii or somehow is not a US citizen. They are trying to get him to show the world his birth certificate. After all you need to show the government your birth certificate to become a Social security recipient so why not president?

Tuesday, May 26, 2009


Top of septic is disintegrating due to gases of unknown origin

Local community organizer whining about the landlord not keeping the houses in good repair (notice he is half light and half dark)

Aerial view of newly-planted local forest

Two orphan trees nobody wanted to transplant

Oak orphan tree out on the street

Sunday, May 24, 2009

Thanks to the BANANAs for the info to post -- they are home

Every new home need some sheets over the windows.

We think the BANANAs are sleeping with the top of the toilet tank but we were afraid to ask why.

And of course the BANANAs are going green with the new house

Looking up the stairs from the basement

Spare bedroom is a work in process to prevent freeloaders from coming up to stay.

The living room

To keep the hops from escaping we put them in cages too

Saturday, May 23, 2009

Another way of feeling warm

If you want another (and perhaps better) point of view on global warming see the link above to get a lecture (six ten minute YouTube entries) by Roy Spencer who works with data from NASA satellites that measure the temperatures on our sacred planet. He is living proof you cannot trust the major media on giving you the whole story of global warming. Spencer is a global warming denier who believes the planet has warmed up in the last 100 years. The question is why.

Our guess is he is so busy he does not have time to sequester carbon using a wood lathe.

source of pic:

And if you want to read a mish-mash of criticism of Spencer see:

Friday, May 22, 2009

Life enrichment gardens will wait until next year

TWW is supposed to be finding out what is eating Mrs. TWW's hostas again

Your new clothes drier

You will get one of these new clothes driers for free from the government and given how much your electric bill will be going up with cap and trade you will be glad to start using it.

Thursday, May 21, 2009

World's oddest advertising sign

Use the link above to learn nobody with that name is a registered sex offender in WI.

UPDATE (Friday):

Woman sentenced for sexual assault of minor

WASHBURN COUNTY – A Minong woman was convicted of sexual assault of a child Wednesday, May 13, at the Washburn County Courthouse.

Dawn M. Thomas, 29, pled no contest in March to second-degree sexual assault of a child and to child enticement with sexual contact, and was found guilty. According to the report, Thomas had forced a 14-year-old boy into intercourse and other sex acts multiple times on May 12, 2008, and offered him alcohol, while he was baby-sitting her child overnight. Later that week, his mother intercepted text messages from Thomas indicating the acts and telling him to keep them secret, the report said. She testified later in court that she had had suspicions upon his return, and that Thomas had said some inappropriate things in front of her son before that." source (as of today):

Wednesday, May 20, 2009

You future trips to the lake will be interesting

Here is what your new CAFE-compliant car will be like. Even if you feel cramped you can feel good about how you are saving the planet. Your inflatable plastic boat should fit in the back with no problem. Only little boys want to pretend they are truckers and pull trailers.

This car is shown on the site

Micro-forests to save the planet

Monday, May 18, 2009

TWW's * original article finally online

* note: at the time of the publication of this article TWW was know as TWWT so perhaps the artist formerly known as TWWT would be a more appropriate description

The messiah blessing the masses?

picture is hot linked from the Drudge report (which is impolite)

Near Miss or Secret Government Chemtrail Program Proof?

Sunday, May 17, 2009

New product fixes plumber's bowls

TWW discovered a new product. Someday he may get the chance to use it when the gardens are all started. The new product fill up cracks so you don't have to worry about having bowls showing their cracks in public.

Day after killer frost

At 9AM it was already 50 degrees so maybe we were spared.

Baby rhubard seems to have survived the killer frost.

Cannot tell if these horny apple trees froze or not.

In this hole yesterday TWW saw his precious tree all bent over to the side and a bunch of orange/brown junk in the hole. When he went over to save the tree the orange/brown junk raised its head and started bleating with fright. Today the hole in the ground was empty and the tree OK.

Saturday, May 16, 2009

Get your new ID card now

To get your card see this web site:

Friday, May 15, 2009

The great uniter of the American people at work

Taken from AP: Rutgers University political scientist Ross Baker says Obama uses such pointed language to create an us-against-them dynamic in which he aligns himself with average Americans and depicts his opponents as selfish powers working just for themselves. Obama's targets, Baker says, usually are unsympathetic and faceless corporations or hedge funds.

"If you use inflammatory, populist language," Baker said in an interview, "it's best to use it on organizations or interests that aren't terribly popular."


When does he get you or your group in his sites?

Thursday, May 14, 2009

Male stripper at his own 30th anniversary party

Another Santa Claus myth debunked

As the in-laws would sit around the campfire imbibing at the cabin someone was sure to start spinning tales from the old days on the farm. The youngsters would sit wide-eyed listening and wondering how their fathers ever reached the age of 20 given the daring deeds and conspiracies they pulled off.

Last Saturday TWW got to visit the site of some of these tales. There was once a bridge atop a canyon with a rushing river where people dived falling at least 50 feet before plunging into the raging current. There were also tales of sheriff's visits complete with lights and sirens. But nature has taken its toll on the gorge and it is now flat. And the bridge shrunk as you can see below and the stream is a mere trickle now. And the Wild Turkey bottle is empty.

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