TWW is The Warped Woodturner who is a local artist living in a suburb of Springbrook, WI (pop 87). His mission is to use a wood lathe to make interesting but mostly useless objects from locally-sequestered carbon for tourists to bring back to the city to give to people they had to buy something for but don't like that well. His target market is the senior citizens since their vision is not as good as it used to be so cannot see the defects as well.
Tuesday, September 25, 2007
Sunday, September 16, 2007
Saturday, September 15, 2007
Mr. BANANA showing up for work in the morning with his signature John Deere.
Mrs. BANANA going for a joyride on her John Deere.
What follows is the story of the BANANAs. Due to privacy concerns we are calling them the BANANAs. In real life they are BA and NA. They will soon be graduates of the Country Freeloading Academy and receive their Certified Country Freeloader (CCF) certificates.
For their student project they choose to build a massive pole garage with freeloaded labor. They achieved a nearly perfect score on the project needing only an excavator to clear the driveway.
In addition they achieved what no other graduates have yet achieved. For people unfamiliar with the principles of country freeloading, the idea is you get people to contribute to your cause and then give them small premiums (like public TV and radio do) so the supporters feel good and keep giving you more support. The BANANAs were the first students to get supporters to donate the premiums they in turn received back so they could feel good about being contributors.
The BANANAs will soon receive their CCFs as soon as we clear up a minor glitch. The BANANAs thought their tuition for the academy was free also so do not want to pay it. Once this is settled the BANANAs will join the ranks of Certified Country Freelaoders.
Congratulations to the BANANAs!
note: For more information on the origins of the principles of country freeloading see: http://warpedwoodturner.blogspot.com/2005/12/successful-country-freeloading.html
Power naps are always the smartest way to work.
Two tins short of a roof. Murphy's Law or Menard's Law? (We report - you decide)
They made TWW go sit in the truck after not working smarter (messing up) the 3rd time.
Sunday, September 09, 2007
Springbrook, WI, USA
Special notice: TWW Enterprises assumes no liability if your friend decides to get even.
Friday, September 07, 2007
And My Bowl Has Got A Hole In It
Ya See My Bowl Has Got A Hole In It
I can see right through.
Monday, September 03, 2007
TWW Enterprises is pleased to announce an addition to its product line. Current products include the Boring Bowl series (finished with mineral oil to be safe for food) and the Bottomless Bowl series. The new series of bowls were named by Mrs. TWW. Upon seeing the bowl shown above (8" x 3" aspen) she exclaimed "Yuk!". Mrs. TWW. does not like shiny bowls.
The Yuck! Bowl product line fills a market niche unmet by the existing two series of bowls. The new bowls have many uses. You can use them to keep unwanted guests from coming to stay. The VOCs in the shellac finish will outgas into salads and leave unwanted or freeloading guests feeling slightly sick. Once they realize every time they come to stay with you they feel sick, they will eventually stop returning.
Other uses include using the bowls to poison husbands and shortening the time you need to wait to inherit something from a will you are named in.
The bowls require minimum maintenance. All that is needed is a fresh coat of shellac every few months or shortly before unwanted guests arrive to refresh the VOCs.
The new series will be made in our new China room in our Garbin production facility. You can recognize them by looking for the Made in China Room label on the bottom.
Saturday, September 01, 2007
Use #1: If you need to have both hands free to put the make on your favorite female (FF) here is a way to do it:
Idea #2: If you are trying to attract a FF it helps to have a good knowledge of beer. Here Jr demos using a Bottomless Bowl to catch spills from a beer glass (note: his was filled with root beer instead of adult beverages).
Idea#3: Here is a good way to keep your glass from being knocked over by some drunken slob who is trying to put the make on the FF you are after.
Idea #4: Here is protection from both spills and drunken slobs.
Idea #5: When leaving home for a trip attach a bottomless bowl to your front door to keep burglars from being able to turn the knob on the door.
If you already have purchased a Bottomless Bowl and found some innovative uses for it please share them with the rest of us by leaving a comment on this post. If you want to buy a Bottomless Bowl you can find find them on our secure ordering site and Amazon.com.
Past posts you fortunately may have missed
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- New bar in the lower level of Garbin Moraine Mano...
- Public Notice
- The BANANAs - Introduction
- The BANANAs Part 1 - The Construction Process
- The BANANAs Part 2 - Some of the Workers
- The BANANAs Part 3 - Working Smarter Not Harder
- The BANANAs Part 4 - Frost Warning
- The BANANAs Part 5 - Premiums
- The BANANAs Part 6 - SUCCESS !
- The BANANAs Part 7 - Going Back Home
- Bottomless Bowl instructions
- Look twice; back-up once
- Help wanted to sing new advertising jingle
- Where's Bowlo?
- Another New Product Series Announced
- Another focus group session
- ▼ September (16)
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