The Warped Woodturner (TWW) is a local artist traveling his artist's journey in a suburb of Springbrook, WI (pop. 536). TWW's creative calling is to use a wood lathe to make useless objects from locally-sequestered organic carbon for tourists to bring back to the city to give to people they had to buy something for but do not like that much. His target market is the senior citizens since their vision is not as good as it used to be so cannot see the defects as well. His marketing jingle is: “Bowls as simple as their creator”.

Sunday, December 31, 2006

A new year - a new format

It is a new year and the recently changed format of this blog did not match the personality of the blogger so we have changed the layout again to what they call 'simple 2'. The TWWT is simple too so this new format will finally match the rest of what goes on with this blog. If you get turned on by profile stuff for some odd reason you can still find it at the bottom of the page. Please remember when you read this blog that the blogger is last century.

Saturday, December 30, 2006

New Year's resolution

TWWT resolves "to be faithful, honest, caring for others, wise, of sound judgement, just, decisive, careful with the wealth of the people and the state... and that his heart is big enough to embrace all without discrimination." There is only one slight problem with this resolution. It comes from a letter from Saddam Hussein where he described what people thought of him. The letter was released by his attorneys after his demise.

Friday, December 29, 2006


Just in time for the new year a raging blizzard dumped 1/2" of snow on us.  Posted by Picasa

Tuesday, December 26, 2006


The entry for January 20th of last year showed enough wood for a week. This year the wood is all gone from the east side of the garage on December 26th. We also will have to order LP gas about a month earlier than last year. This is more proof of global warming. It is taking more energy to heat our house as the temperatures rise. Posted by Picasa

Thanks to RA/SA of ROC for the nice wine holder from Costa Rico. Posted by Picasa

Saturday, December 23, 2006


Lone reindeer looking for snow.  Posted by Picasa

Friday, December 22, 2006


"I'd like to thank Dave and Di for taking me on a 4,000 mile trip through the central part of the US. My regular hosts were too cheap to take me anywhere except to see a big fish." - Flat Jay  Posted by Picasa

No it is not a flying saucer. It is a heat vent in the basement ceiling. For a life enrichment opportunity yesterday we extended the vent pipe and cut a hole in a ceiling tile to finally get part of the suspended ceiling done.  Posted by Picasa

Tuesday, December 19, 2006

Change your blog to enrich the lives of your viewers

We changed the format of this blog to help you wonder where you are in the web. It will change your life just as seeing Al Gore's movie did.

We don't want a brown Christmas but are afraid of being called anti-immigrant so we found a solution (see below).
 Posted by Picasa

Woodturners accumulate wood shavings and sawdust. It is a continual problem of how to put the waste to a good use. We have decided this season to dump shavings on our lawn to hide the brown in time for Christmas. That way we won't have a brown Christmas.  Posted by Picasa

Sunday, December 10, 2006


Christmas lights and global warming don't mix. This is more proof of global warming. See Dec 5th entry for even more proof.  Posted by Picasa

Saturday, December 09, 2006


When other people rob you of life satisfaction by sitting in YOUR chair upstairs one solution is to buy a separate chair for guests and put it in the basement for them to use. A NO TRESPASSING sign on YOUR chair may be cheaper but may cost you a few friends.  Posted by Picasa

Tuesday, December 05, 2006


Ebonized 5" oak test bowl (made by dipping an oak bowl in vinegar that has had steel wool soaked in it). The shine comes from a fresh wiping with mineral oil in a paper towel. Watching the mineral oil dry is another life enrichment activity we have discovered.  Posted by Picasa

More proof of climate change. It was 50 degrees F last week. Posted by Picasa

Friday, December 01, 2006


This is a 12" short bowl made by reusing a cutting board. As per usual we have done our best to create the best imperfect product we can. Making bowls for seniors is the market niche we are going to pursue since their vision is not what it used to be so they cannot see the blemishes as well as youngsters can.  Posted by Picasa

A boring activity is piling up brush to burn before the snow melts away in spring. When we burn it next spring it will be a life enrichment activity without anybody dying like they do when people try to enrich their lives by watching network TV at night with the pictures of fires in the aftermath of people dying. The only animals in danger here will be the mice that take up residence in the pile.  Posted by Picasa

Thursday, November 30, 2006


Another freeloader on our hands Posted by Picasa

A little orange dog left this track Posted by Picasa

A mystery animal stalks our land. Posted by Picasa

Thursday, November 23, 2006


Happy Thanksgiving from the land of whizzing bullets and the men in orange.  Posted by Picasa

Saturday, November 18, 2006


Sometimes you are doing life enrichment activities and don't even realize it. Here Mr and Mrs TWWT are watching their feet as the basement woodstove warms them up. It sure beats watching a TV set.  Posted by Picasa


In the book A Pattern Language Alexander etc. talk about how large pains of glass alienate people from the view. Therefore we put a grid on the windows by the bar to get a better view of what people do in our hot tub. See this link for more info on A Pattern Language which we highly recommend for enriching your life by enriching your environment: http://downlode.org/etext/patterns/ptn239.html. For further life enrichment we took a square and found how many panes are really square. You may notice the ceiling has lights hanging down. Putting lights into the basement will enrich our lives this winter. Posted by Picasa

Thursday, November 16, 2006

We are not alone

We heard it on NPR. There is a web site for people who are even more boring than the TWWT. It is even a club with T-shirts for members. We tried to join but they never got back to us. We think that means our life enrichment steps are making our lives too exciting and we are ineligible to join now . To see the club visit: http://www.dullmen.com/home.html

On a recent trip to the city Professor R. Squared gave us some exotic wood with the stipulation his wife got the pick of the litter of baby bowls. Here is the first born bowllette. Posted by Picasa

Two deer in need of conflict resolution training.  Posted by Picasa

Friday, November 10, 2006

Picture identification experiment

Earlier we posted the picture and text below. The hope was other people would help us enrich our lives with their comments. The experiment attracted several comments so we will leave it run a little longer. Just so you know I ate most of the item shown below. It was pretty boring. The picture is of a loaf of bread as it came from a bread machine. Thanks to all the people who left comments. You have enriched our lives. -- TWWT
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We need you help in identifying who or what this is. Please put your answer in as a comment. We found this item on our land. Posted by Picasa

Wednesday, November 08, 2006


We have discovered another way to enrich one's life. If you have Windows you can go to the desk top and pull up properties. Then you open up the screen saver tab and select My Picture Slide Show. This feature will go through pictures stored on the computer and show them in a slide show. For even more fun while at a friend's house sneak into their computer and set up this slide show. Your friend may get a surprise since whatever is on their computer will be shown to everyone who looks at the computer screen. Posted by Picasa

Sunday, November 05, 2006


Our consultant suggested we call Digger's Hotline and have them come out so we can watch them for entertainment. They have neat beeping machines and spray arrows on the ground. Posted by Picasa

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